What Being Coached Taught Me About Coaching

Leadership is often synonymous with expertise. We step into positions of influence because of our knowledge, our experience, and our ability to solve problems. But what if I told you that one of the most underutilized leadership muscles isn’t expertise—it’s being coachable?

As someone who coaches leaders and organizations through change, I’ve spent years honing my ability to ask the right questions, create space for reflection, and help people unlock their own clarity. But recently, I’ve had the experience of being on the other side—of being coached. And through this process, I’ve come to a powerful realization: You cannot be an effective coach if you are unwilling to be coached yourself. This realization is exactly why I offer leadership coaching—because I know firsthand how transformative it can be when leaders have a dedicated space to think, reflect, and grow.

Too often, leaders are so focused on growing their teams, developing talent, and solving problems that they rarely experience the kind of deep, reflective space that they offer others. We are conditioned to lead from a place of knowing rather than from a place of learning. Yet, in my own coaching journey, I’ve learned that the best way to support others is to continually open myself up to the same process of growth and self-inquiry that I encourage in them.

The Power of Being Coached

One of the most profound lessons I’ve learned from being coached is the value of having my own thinking mirrored back to me. As leaders, we spend so much time making decisions, managing teams, and strategizing that we don’t always have the opportunity to step back and process. Coaching creates that space—where someone else listens deeply, asks the right questions, and helps you see patterns and possibilities you may have missed.

Through being coached, I’ve realized:

1. Coaching isn’t about fixing; it’s about revealing. A great coach doesn’t give answers—they help surface the wisdom you already hold. This has reshaped how I approach my own coaching conversations, ensuring that I am not leading with solutions but with curiosity.

2. Leaders need space to think. In fast-paced environments, the expectation is often to produce and perform, not to pause and reflect. But the best decisions come from clarity, and clarity comes from having time to process.

3. Vulnerability is a leadership strength. Being coached has challenged me to admit what I don’t know, to wrestle with uncertainty, and to lean into learning. And when I bring that same mindset into my coaching, it encourages others to do the same.

   
   

Coaching as a Leadership Practice

Many leaders view coaching as something they provide to others but not necessarily something they need for themselves. But the reality is that the best coaches, mentors, and managers are the ones who are committed to their own growth. When we engage in coaching—when we let ourselves be guided, questioned, and supported—we build the capacity to do the same for others.

If you’re in a leadership role, I encourage you to ask yourself:

• When was the last time I had a space to process my own thinking?

• How often do I seek out feedback and reflection, rather than just giving it?

• Am I willing to be as open to learning as I expect my team to be?

  
  

The truth is, we cannot truly grow others unless we are committed to growing ourselves. Coaching isn’t just a tool for leadership development—it is a leadership practice. And the more we embrace being coached, the better we become at coaching others.

This is exactly why I’ve made leadership coaching a core part of my work—because leaders deserve the same thoughtful, reflective, and strategic space they provide for others. If you’re a leader looking to strengthen your coaching muscle—starting with yourself—let’s talk. I help leaders navigate change, build capacity, and create space for real learning. Ready to invest in your own growth? Let’s connect.